Archives for motherhood

When It Pays to be Unproductive

I grew up in a family where as soon as we were done eating, my grandmother would get out her Hokey vacuum sweeper and pick up every last crumb from under the table.  Every meal was directly followed by well-orchestrated dish washing and when my grandmother finally got a dishwasher, everything still needed to be washed before going in it.  I’m not sure if this mentality came from growing up on a farm (I didn’t, but my parents did) where everyone is up before dawn and the work is never done, but I come from a family that can’t bring

Time to Clean Your Filter

Several years ago I was working on a big personal event with one of my corporate clients and I screwed up. Not in the “someone got hurt” kind of way, but one that was just as monumental to the client in an “event planning type of way”. It was huge to the client and as a result, it was huge to me. I felt so bad and even though I was quick to make it right, I could not shake the feeling that I had really let her down and couldn’t forgive myself for making such a careless mistake. I

Keep Your Eyes On Your Toes

Recently I had lunch with a friend that was talking about how she has two free days per week freed up now that both of her kids are in school full time, and all the plans she has for that time.  But she then went on to lament how in the foreseeable future one or more of those days are getting scheduled and thus she won’t start XYZ projects until she has two consecutive unfettered days available. As an observer, it’s always much easier to see the holes in someone else’s plan.  So let’s go for it. What is the likeliness

4 Survival Tips for Summer

As a kid there is nothing better than summer vacation–late nights, late mornings, no homework, more junk food, more TV and endless play time.  At least that is how I remember it in the 70s when I was growing up.  And while I never sensed that my mom was going out of her mind at the time, she had to have had her moments.  As I “work” through another summer with my boys, here are my four survival tips for summer that I learned from my mom! #1. Great Summer Care is Not Easy to Find My mom opened a

Tis the Season

Each time we transition from one season to the next, we feel the change in the weather and we adjust accordingly…stocking up hats and gloves, or shedding down to our swim suits.  Activities and interests change and availability to friends differs.  This is not unlike the seasons that we experience in our lives, albeit not ones that last only three months and are quite as predictable. As I look back on my life, I’ve had many “seasons”. My first being my toddler years (what I can remember of them) and into elementary school where I forged my first friendships and

8 Steps to Weeding Your Life

I’ve noted before, that while my mom passed many of her talents to me, her green thumb was/is not one of them. I love the look of nature, but I’m not the one that likes to convene in it on a regular basis. At least not the type of nature that means digging in the dirt and getting overheated! But at the beginning of each season, I pretend to have a green thumb for one day and get everything “back in order” so that my husband can then attend to it for the rest of the summer. As I was

Get Your Own Hose

I doubt that I’m alone when I say that sometimes I can get jealous.  Like when I see one of my friends on a fabulous work trip—you know the ones where they don’t have to cook, clean, deal with bedtime, and can wake up “naturally”.  Or the days when I see the mom’s chatting on the playground as their children run about and I think, “Oh I wish I was a stay at home mom, and each day I could decide what playdate to have.” I think we have all had times when the grass seems greener on the other side. 

My Big Ugly Cry

My mom used to cry every time that I left to go back to college, or later whenever we parted ways after a visit, and I would get so exasperated, almost embarrassed.  She was also a sucker for Kleenex and Hallmark commercials.  In my mind, she was a complete mush!  Of course, now she’s gone, and like most things that drove me crazy about her, I get it.  And dare say that I’ve become her.  I’m a complete empathetic crier.  I see someone else cry…I absolutely feel their pain, joy, hurt and I join right in.  I cry every time my

All My Pants Have Stretch

When we bought our house years ago our realtor was with an office that had the owner’s face on everything—from moving trucks, to for sale signs, to billboards.  They were the “face” of the company.  I remember thinking how striking the individual was in these photos.  And then we met the owner.  And while still a striking individual, they did not look at all like their photo.  Let’s just say the photo had not been updated in many many years.  We all change over the years.  That’s life.  The key is to admitting to it! But my take away from

My Best Marriage Decision

When two people come together and marry there are many decisions to be made.  Kids or no kids?  City life or suburbia?  Work or stay home?  And then there are about a bjillion more decisions that you make that are completely unconscious.  I have to say that the best decision that we ever made, or didn’t as it were as it’s just the way we’ve always done it, is to have separate bank accounts. While this makes complete sense to me, I definitely think that we are in the minority. When Zain was little and we did endless play dates